Gaia Community: Wabisabisatva's Blog

You Will Be Okay Without It

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 21:54:41 GMT

whatever it is
it will be
gone
tomorrow
and since
there is
no tomorrow
it is
already
gone
you
can not have it
what would happen if
you
simply
decided
to let go of it
since it is already letting go of
you
let go of
you
let go of
your things
let go of things
they are already
going

dusty pages
yellowed
hard drive
crashing
memory loss
insanity
aging
breathless running

love is not having
having is not love
not love is having
is having love not?
having not love is
simply
true
without
is with
within
is with
here
inside
is the witness
is the voice
that says
you will be okay
without
having
this
without
having
this
body
without
having
this
thought
without
having
this
mind
without
having
this
car
without
having
this
marriage
this
partner
this
life
you
will
be
ok
without
it.

Tags: impermanence, meditation, mindfulness, passion, attachment, materialism, death, life, ego, practice

Remember What You Are

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 22:01:27 GMT

The sun seeps
through the golden beaded seams
crimson reflections fill the walls
cinnamon warmth growing
glowing in askance
make something of me
use me for your soul
let me remind you
of your purpose
create this
remind me
of myself
remind me of my beauty
of my penetrating light
remind me of my essence
of my presence

Co-creators here we can join
Feel my texture
Sharp yellow fangs
dug in deep
into every pore of your skin
feeding on you
as you feed on me
do not look straight into my eyes
for I will burn you
take me in glances
between the shadows
take me at dusk and dawn
beneath the trees in slivers
take me in slow breaths
after a black night of sleep
take me in all my colors
hiding in a dense fog
remember me
even when I am hidden
I am still here
remember me

Tags: memory, consciousness, earth, mother, sun, environment, co-creation, breathing, meditation, creation, creativity

The Breath of Morning

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 02:29:13 GMT

Morning sun
breathes hello
tree branches
shine with winter cold
cat window
shadow dance
coffee sweet
a season in itself
summer infused
thou not yet spring
no sign of leaves
nor buds
in the sleeping beauty
not yet kissed
by the prince of spring
patience underneath
the aura of stillness
patient life
waiting to come forth
cooking, brewing
vibrant stew
patience in the morning breath

Tags: seasons, transition, nature, environment, patience, meditation, life, death

When was the last time you felt insecure?

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 15:51:31 GMT

My thoughts are immediately of Krishnamurti who says that there is no such thing as "security." I suppose, then, that I have never been anything other than insecure. Last night I read in

John Daido Loori's book: The Zen of Creativity (which is great, btw), the following related to security: "In a society that assures us that more is better, it's not always easy to trust that we have enough, that we are enough. We have to cut through the illusion that abundance is security, and trust that we don't have to buffer ourselves against reality. If we have learned to trust abundance, we can learn to trust simplicity. We can practice simplicity." It seems to me that trust overrides the duality of being either secure or insecure, rather you simply remain with what is.

Tags: QaR, insecure, shyness, uncertainty, comfort

What do you think is the hardest thing to change?

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 00:00:23 GMT

minds

Tags: QaR, hope, action, care, mind

A Dream of terrible clarity

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Sat, 22 Dec 2007 13:38:55 GMT

A Dream of terrible clarity

tree deep trunk
rooted coarse wrinkled with time
waiting for the water to reach down
into the ground, into the soil
bodies waiting around the edge
lifeless and gagged, women gray, green, yellow
blue and putrid
silenced by time and again
waiting to be relieved
unable to move
stay still
the voices call
as the oceans waves dance
creation and destruction
they remain bound
in their empty wombs
hollow and unfed
muted by the roar of the currents
moving in on the shore
mother is gone
dead by the seaside
you will hear from her no more
she cannot speak
she cannot sing
she cannot cry

Tags: woman, womb, birth, death, cycles, nature, gaia, creation, destruction, feminism, gender

I wonder if It will End with Something Unoffending?

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 05:07:23 GMT

Hmmmm.....
I thought I felt
A feeling
Bad
A feeling
Sad
A feeling
Glad
But then it was
Gone
But then I was
None
But here I am
Again
I thought I could
Remember
I thought I could
Recover
I thought I could
Revive
But instead I wonder
If I'm alive
It really is confusing
All of this musing
I wonder if it will end
With something unoffending?

Tags: feelings, memory, zen, simple, death, life, meditation, muse, alive, vitality, presence

Pick three words that describe you as you are right now.

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 06:39:52 GMT

Alive, Dying, Full

Tags: QaR, words, description, self

The Environment of Creation

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 19:09:33 GMT

How do we distinguish between being masochistic and being spiritual?

There are so many times in life that it seems a valid goal to be with the situation as it is and not have the need to run away from external circumstances that seem to being taking us out of our center. But when is it wise to make a choice to remove oneself from a situation that is not healthy or is a consistent distraction from our life's purpose.

When do you say enough and move on?

Like so many other challenging aspects of life- this too appears to require an acute awareness of where the line is between taking care of oneself and running away from one's own experiences in life. So you are living with roommates that you can't stand and trying to be disciplined in your daily life with your art, your reading, your spiritual practices and are constantly interrupted literally and just generally energetically. Thus you have a consistent reason not to be able to complete the tasks that you have set out for yourself. Let's face it anyone trying to be disciplined with their spiritual practice or living on the creative life path faces enough internal, daily obstacles, that the last thing that they need are external distractions. There is already so much resistance around that existential meaning crisis that so many artists and spiritual seekers face. Ironically, you find time and again that artists do place themselves in challenging external environments. So why do we do this?

Do we do this to hinder the artist process, so that we can place blame on external circumstances and not have to take responsibility for our lack of ability to be creative to concentrate on our life's work? Is this external environment actually an escape from the basic existential anxiety around trying to create meaning in one's life?

Or is it actually just this opposite: is this external environment actually the fuel that sends the artist back to themselves - like the concept of equal and opposite forces. Is it that the more external distraction that the artist faces the more he/she must return to his/her core and with more distraction he/she moves deeper inside of his/herself? But what is the balance?

How does the artist know which is the right answer?

It is true that I should be able to maintain my center no matter what the external circumstances -but is this a necessary component of my creative process? It is similar in many ways to the artistic concern, throughout the ages, that without deep heartache and pain that the artist would not be able to create. But isn't creation that comes out of these painful places a different kind of art? Can art be classified based on its emotional or spiritual origin? Is this reactionary art? Collective consciousness art? Universal principal art? or I hate my roommates and can't really focus art? Do all of these have the same purpose in their existence?

Is catharsis of emotion in the form of a painting the same as the ink drawing of a spiritual master who has meditated for decades?

Obviously, all art has different messages and energies to convey...so perhaps this is how you, as an artist, decide what environment to place yourself in. If you want to do reactionary art - place yourself in the such an environment which will consistently provoke this. If you want to present universal principles - do the like. The core element, perhaps, is to recognize when you do have choices and why you are making the choices that you are. The circumstances in which you find yourself are not an accident. Taking responsibility for the environment in which you find yourself both externally and internally is part and parcel to the production of an authentic, creative, and aligned spiritual being. Another aspect here, to keep in mind, is that we have a tendency to repeat the patterns that we have grown up with. So if you grew up in an environment where you constantly felt inclined to hide away and this is where and when you produced your art - you will likely be inclined to produce the same circumstances throughout life in which to produce your art. It is as though you associate these emotions and this state mind and general state of external energy with the production of art. Somewhere in your consciousness there is a belief that without these uncomfortable, distracting circumstances you actually wouldn't be able to be artistic, that your creative self literally needs to feed on being reactive against negative external energies. Maybe this is true? Maybe it is not. But the key is to be mindful of these aspects and to allow yourself to experiment with what happens if you drop this story - What happens when there are no longer any distractions from the outside? Then do you begin to mimic the negative energies internally? Do you begin to feel anxious? Or do you actually feel free to be creative in a naturally aligned way, not reacting anything but actually able to mirror or channel the energies of the universe without interruption?

Tags: masochism, spiritual, art, artist, obstacles, environment, creation, creative, balance, catharsis, authentic

Blooming at the Threshold

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Fri, 22 Jun 2007 17:58:43 GMT

Blooming at the threshold
I invite you to be here
to inhabit this liminal space
where illusion begins
to disintegrate
standing on this razor's edge
noticing your breath
feeling what it means
to live in this body
feeding on the nutrients
this earth provides
residing in this space
constant and not at all
recognizing the compassion
of reality
sun filled fatality
moon bright mortality
present to the irony
of material causality

Diamond eyes
cutting through the lies
heartache full
sadness free
I know you see

be in between
the solitary cave and
the systematized slave
the possibility of truth
rests in the unknown
No absolutes hiding
to be found
energetic cycle round
existing here
in this earth bound
beginning and ending.

Tags: body, spirit, soul, slave, system, earth, environment, truth, diamond heart, mortality, space

Discipline, E-go, and Energy of the Universe

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 17:53:43 GMT

Is it true that the less that we have to figure out about "what to do", on a daily basis the happier we are, or is this yet another way to distract ourselves from the unknown and emptiness that is life. Does routine mean the same thing as discipline? Is this the golden route to contentment, enlightenment. Don't think- just do. Just do the same thing everyday- then there is no question about what I am supposed to be doing... nothing to think about ...no mind ..yes this would seem like it was a good thing...more action - less neurotic thought that keeps us cycling in loops of internal processing with no external action in the world. I suppose that it comes back to if there is truly a difference between the internal and external that I am talking about.
    Action in the world is like meditation....keep coming back to the breath and let the thought go....does that translate into keep coming back to being focused on the exact task that you have before you ...without letting any thoughts interrupt you? Like right in this moment - I am typing on this computer....I just typed the word computer...do I keep thinking about the fact that I just typed computer ...do I think about what I am going to type next....do I worry about what I want to type next....well in some ways - yes I am thinking about what I want to type next ...but if I begin to think about it too much, I become frozen - frozen in the loop of thought....perhaps it is not thought which is actually allowing me to type these words but instead a movement of energy - a movement of energy which is simply passing through me and over which I would like to imagine that I have control- I mean these are "my" words rights- this is "my" construction right--- or maybe it's not ....and maybe this is a relief- because then I have nothing to worry about...there is no wrong word ...what I am writing can't be wrong/right - it is just simply the neutral energy that is flowing through this particular entity that I like to call me...
    But what if I just stopped the whole charade and decided that everyday ---I was going to let the energy of the universe simply pass through me....if I stopped thinking that it was all about me and what I am supposed to do in the world and instead, simply let it happen....wake up every morning and ask myself ....ok energy of the universe - how would you like to pass through me today? In what way will you manifest through this human form today? What a relief that would be....to stop the illusion of my little ego....maybe I can translate e-go into - "e" for energy and "go" for its desire to go somewhere - to do something....it is not an "I"go but an "e"go ....e is for the potential of that energy to move....
    We can even move this concept into the context of literal psychological ego development - when we talk about someone whose ego is not fully developed ....or who is experiencing some sort of neurosis - aren't we just actually saying that this individual's energy is not functioning as it should.....for instance ----neurosis in some many cases is a repetition of thought - which causes a persons energy to become stuck in one repeating cycle....all the great spiritual teachers of the world have understood this - when they do something outrageous to simply knock someone out of this repeating energetic cycle....e-go - the ego actually wants to move- to wants to go ... and eventually it wants to disappear ....into the pure energy that it actually has always been..... I can't wait to become a fully e-go-centric being...to let all of that energy move out of my center ...and to let that rule the way that I live my life....imagine the possibilities of letting go of all the thoughts that we use to take us away from this energetic core....it's ironic how much energy we actually expend to try to keep us safe from this universal energetic law.....it reminds me of the feeling of trying to stop yourself from running down a steep hill....the more that you try to stop yourself from getting pulled by gravity ...the more energy that you actually expend...but there is something almost viscerally frightening to people about just letting go and letting yourself get pulled down that hill- at a high speed....everything starts moving so fast and you feel that you have no control...and you wonder if you will be able to stop when you want to .....this feeling ---- is literally allowing the energy of the universe to guide your life.....gravity wants you to run down that hill....actually gravity ...doesn't really care what "you" do ----it is simply doing what it does....moving objects in nature and you in that moment, in fact, in every moment are an object in nature....gravity is not worried about how fast it is carrying you....somehow, we need to translate this understanding back into the rest of our lives.....and usually, it is thoughts and their related feelings...which take us away from this understanding......thoughts are you trying to slow yourself down from truly getting carried along in the currents and energies of the universe....
    However, we also know that without our hearts and our minds, the understanding of this motion and energy wouldn't be possible...so what is the balance between using ones heart and mind to experience the reality of energy and not letting our heart or our mind obscure our vision and experience of this reality....I suppose this is the ultimate spiritual task....having a heart and a mind is part of our toolbox as humans....these elements are actually channels through which energy may flow....but we must know how to navigate these channels....this is much of what the practice of meditation is all about...to recognize the nature to the mind, the heart, the body..... to connect with the experience of each of these - without becoming lost in any aspect....we must completely connect with these aspects and at the same time learn how to completely remove ourselves from these aspects. so - once again, there is an irony....I must utilize the discipline of the mind ..in order to have clarity in the understanding of how the energy of the universe is working through me ...I must consistently remind myself, a task of the disciplined mind- "reminding," that truly it is not about me, not about my ego, but about my "e"-go - about me allowing the energy of the universe to move through me....the origins of the word universe are interesting to keep in mind in this understanding. The Online Etymology dictionary says the following of the origin of the world universe: "the whole world, cosmos," from O.Fr. univers (12c.), from L. universum "the universe," noun use of neut. of adj. universus "all together," lit. "turned into one," from unus "one" versus, pp. of vertere "to turn" (http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?l=u&p=7). One, all encompassing turning, one all encompassing movement of energy.....to be part of the universe ...means to be part of a collective, unified, turning of energy.....so all one need do is to let oneself feel and to be moved by that which we are all already part of, anything other than this will undoubtedly cause undo suffering. So why not let yourself feel gravity...because it will be working on you regardless of whether or not you chose to acknowledge its presence.

Tags: discipline, ego, energy, universe, suffering, gravity, routine, meditation, action, mind, emptiness

All Bottled Up: Our "Disposable Society"

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Mon, 28 May 2007 16:15:43 GMT

I was reading this article, The Unintended Consequences of Hyperhydration
on the New York Times website this morning and was shocked by these details:

Here is a direct link to the article: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/27/magazine/27Bottle-t.html?em&ex=1180497600&en=0ad619333e36f470&ei=5087%0A

Americans buy about 215 billion beverage containers every year, more than quadruple those bought in 1971.

Americans will throw out more than two million tons of PET bottles this year. Even when recycled, it is hard to turn scrap PET into new bottles. More virgin material is always necessary. PET is a petroleum product; it comes from oil. The Container Recycling Institute estimates that 18 million barrels of crude-oil equivalent were needed to replace the bottles we chucked in 2005, bottles that were likely shipped long distances to begin with -from Maine or Calistoga or Fiji.

While recycling advocates rail against society's wastefulness as a solemn problem, so much of that society relies on the freedom to throw things out as a solution to problems. As naïve as it looks, the bottle bill forces the very contemporary environmental question of whether those who sell a product, not to mention those who use it, should be accountable for its mess - and just how accountable, and at what cost. By Day 3 in Salem, one dumbstruck grocer, pressed after his testimony, finally blurted out: "Are we responsible for all the containers and all the garbage we sell?" He meant it as a rhetorical question. But it's precisely the question that, for 36 years, everyone has been getting together to hash out.

For decades, producing glass bottles was so costly that bottlers operated their own deposit systems to ensure they got them back. Beer usually came in glass "stubbies," each with a deposit of a few cents. A stubby could be returned to any local bottler, regardless of its brand. There it was sterilized, scrubbed clean of its label and refilled. A single container could be repurposed as many as 30 times. But by the '60s, aluminum cans were ubiquitous, and glass bottles were shedding their deposits. The convenience of these new "one way," or disposable, containers was marketed enthusiastically. By 1970, nearly 40 percent of America's packaged soda and 75 percent of its packaged beer came in one-ways.

Eric A. Goldstein of the Natural Resources Defense Council describes the first bottle bills emerging at a time when nationalizing markets were making goods more affordable and convenient, but also further detaching consumers from their environmental costs. The one-way soda can is only convenient because we can throw it out when we're finished and don't have to worry where it goes. So is the Bic razor, the paper towel, the disposable camera and the Swiffer mop head. "As significant as the bottle-bill legislation is," Goldstein says, "the growing movement toward a throwaway society that started in the '60s and '70s is an even larger trend."

This year, Americans will drink more than nine billion gallons of bottled water, nearly all of it from polyethylene terephthalate, or PET, plastic bottles. Water, together with other nonfizzy drinks, accounted for 90 percent of the growth of the entire beverage industry between 2002 and 2005. By the end of the decade, they are expected to outsell soda.

Michelle Barry of the market research firm the Hartman Group told me, "Water is not really critically considered" - not even the object itself, it seems. "We believe bottled water has become less about the physical act of hydration and more about being a companion to people," she said. "They like to walk around with it and hold it." Increasingly, the typical consumer sips out of a bottle of water "to mark time." "It's like their bangie," Barry added, meaning a security blanket. Or rather, each bottle of water is one in a readily available cast of interchangeable security blankets that we can capriciously acquire and toss throughout the day.

Tags: oil, war, environment, recycle, water, consumption, consumer, convenience, polyethylene terephthalate, PET

New York Buddha

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Fri, 25 May 2007 19:50:21 GMT

Chinatown sweeties
bubble tea retreaties
smells like fish
and makes us free
free to be
buddhist please
jade just made
diamonds by tons
packed to the max
with languages of all
hello kitty
dumpling city
ducks hanging by their legs
girls hanging by their mates
tongues pierced
music fierce
diverse people
gathered by churches steeple
munchies paradise
pokee man's market place
mulberry, mott, and canal
filled with lychee nuts and bamboo
shoots and little toy birds humming in cages
and some man singing in rages
mee kong store brimming with more
green teas and dried up leaves
fruits gallore and noodles for sure
udon, rice, and egg
there is no need to beg
prices are cheap
in this downtown heap
sandalwood streams down the street
incense, elephants, and amethyst you will meet
african men next to orange stands
roasted nuts next to fried dough stalls
yin and yang, in cycle will blend
buddha's dream

Tags: new york, chinatown, buddhism, buddha, retreat, diversity, yin and yang

Elation

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Sun, 22 Apr 2007 23:11:10 GMT

I wrote this a few years back and it somehow feels like it has more to say to me again....it is a reminder of what we already know and seem to always forget about what it means to be spiritual beings trying to make sense of the material world in which we find ourselves living.

translucent time
waves and rhymes
thoughts get caught on webs and grime
what's the crime
you can't read my mind
bending and soaring
folding and roaring
singing and beating
a drum, a door
what is it all for?
to move your mind
through space and time
to calm your thoughts
and find your soul
to lose yourself
and find your space
a space of peace
a case of dis-ease
a hunger so deep
no food could ever reach
walking in wind
speaking in tongues
we can't comprehend
give me your hand
hold on to your hat
where we are going you
can never come back
past the heart
and into the part
that has no name
to somehow reclaim
proclamation emancipation
devastation and utilization

Use the breathe
to find the beat
use the beat
to find the heat
the hot
the not
that is
that was
that self
less than before
you never knew
never you
but just a body
carrying you through
thoughts like long lost reports
an opera in the mind
singing to be embraced
stop the voices
make no choices
just stop and listen
static and we automatically
change the station
when this broadcast has the greatest
elation
concentration - lotus and notice
focus and fire
kundalini crying out with desire
satisfy the serpent with a pose
of tranquility
living out your life of humility
simple gestures
reveal long lost treasures
a breath, a beat
calm the mind and settle the spirit
sing with silence
and walk in retreat
you have lost and the song has begun
let it sing while you listen and watch the sun
feel the heat, see the flame
but always remain without a name
for you and it are one in the same.

Tags: time, thoughts, soul, ego, elation, kundalini, focus, fire, lotus, discipline, practice

Study the Angles of Your Discontent

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Thu, 19 Apr 2007 17:55:18 GMT

Unwaiting
for the sun will
rise and set
Study the angles
of your discontent

sit in silence

Unknown
sadness and pleasure
sing inside
a clear blue sky
closing in on dusk

Tags: meditation, sitting, discipline, sadness, pleasure, grief, discontent, silence

Attachment: Health or Suffering?

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 04:32:59 GMT

I have been thinking a great deal about what attachment is and whether it is "good" or "bad." In Western developmental psychology, we learn that in order for an infant to develop basic trust in his/her world and feel a sense of safety, he/she must develop a healthy attachment with his/her mother or some similar figure. The first thing that stands out to me is this notion of "healthy attachment," after years of studying Buddhism, I am trying to make sense of it all. Is there such a thing as healthy attachment? For that matter, is there such a thing as unhealthy attachment? What is attachment anyway? Is it a physical need? A chemical need? A biochemical dependence? Does a newborn infant need to develop an addiction to mom in order to be deemed healthy? Or is this health once again a Western concept completely wrapped up in the notion that "an individual" needs to develop a healthy, concrete, solid ego, in order to function "normally."

Then a few decades pass and infant has passed through toddler-hood, pre-pubescence, teenage-hood, and slowly makes their way into adulthood. As they make these transitions, health is signified by the ability to no longer be so attached, to break away, and to stand on ones own two feet. I am starting to wonder if we, in Western psychological understanding, all haven't been duped with a bunch of double messages. Now you reach adulthood, you are married, in intimate relationship, and you are working with two seemingly opposing models of how to be in the world and in relationship: you want to feed your healthy attachment/addiction? and you want to break away and be independent. No wonder that we have so many people that don't know how to function in relationship. Well that's a start....then throw in the idea or feeling of love and things get even more complicated....any ideas?

Tags: psychology, development, love, attachment, ego, mother, infant, addiction, western, transition, relationship

The Scarcity

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 10 Apr 2007 05:29:50 GMT

Scarcity mentality

can I try it?

can I have it?

can I buy it?

can I own it?

Abundant tragedy

when we find the answer

when we feel the loss

when we feed and starve

when we fear and grieve

Spacious breaths

offered up in devotion

open and raw

outcast and wounded

old and withered

Aged love

Tags: scarcity, abundance, grief, loss, breath, space, love, time, aging, devotion, fear

"Space is the Breath of Art"

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Fri, 06 Apr 2007 21:05:12 GMT

This is excerpt of a paper that I wrote for a class called "Process Painting and Meditation."   The paper explored the connections between meditation, painting, the therapeutic process and other creative processes.

The experience of this energy, without being able to explain it with words, pointed out to me another commonality between painting and meditation: the experience of what is. In some way, the presence and awareness that we bring to these processes is our greatest creativity. For me this insight was a relief, the discovery that I do not have to do anything to be creative but that I am innately a creative being. In fact, I have spent most of my life suppressing what is naturally there inside, wanting to be expressed. All that I have to do to be creative is to breathe and see what comes. As Frank Lloyd Wright
said: "Space is the breath of art."
        It is this idea of space, the empty white page, the blank canvas, that brought my thoughts back to how these experiences will be useful in the therapeutic process. I thought of the empty white page and the Buddhist concept of heaven. Heaven is that moment, (in life and in art), before you fill in the space and just experience the openness, fear, excitement and the endless possibility. Next comes the moment you paint your first stroke; this is earth. This moment between heaven and earth, before contact, of not knowing what will be produced reminded me of this same experience between client and therapist. If, as with painting, I can come to the canvas of my client with no expectations and no agenda, anything will be possible.
         One of the greatest lessons here is to see how agenda prevents real and genuine presence, awareness, and contact. I can not see what "is" if I am holding on to what I would like to see.
       The parallels between meditation and painting have presented me with new ways of understanding the polarity between mind and no- mind. I have also gained greater clarity in the recognition that much of what I am holding on to, is already disappearing or gone as I am trying to hold on tighter. Whether it be a thought, a feeling, a person, or an image- before I have even begun to understand it is already in the process of transforming. Art like life is not about capturing something in its unreal, permanent state, but instead about producing a state of energy, motion, and impermanence that is always changing. Some wise teacher once said to me, you're not the same person that you were yesterday. "We should not complain about impermanence, because without impermanence, nothing is possible." Thich Nhat Hanh

Tags: art, creativity, painting, process, impermanence, Thich Nhat Hanh, mind, awareness, presence, contact, client

In Strange Fits of Passion We Often Find Our Lives Waiting

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Sat, 31 Mar 2007 05:48:58 GMT

in strange fits of passion we often find our lives waiting- in strange fits of passion we often find our lives degrading - in strange fits of passion we often spend time creating- our animal urges we are always trying to purge - our feeling hearts we are always trying to steal- look at the time - alarm - look at the time - now- look at the time- it's gone- look at the time that's past- look at the time- it wasn't meant to last- look at the time- if I had a dime for every time someone asked me - excuse me but do you have the time- the time for what? the time - t i me - subway doors - closed - cubicle stalls - encased - document erased - computer eyes and technological minds - human kind - turned to human clones - human drones - human alones - human moans- devoid of emotion - avoid the lines of government control - and enter the chaos of a path of your own - the best things in life usually can not be shown- always need to be home grown - home hone in hot healing harm have to be dealing dark days reveal lighter ways weighted intentions- creating crystallic dimensions divided derided in detention delusion we find forests of hate hungers so great graphic grim green turned to brown bade basking in the drown down round rewinded globe glows gleaming with possibilities planetary paths paved with light infused with all that is right regal revive recovery into rebirth and onto a new search starlight stage fright stew dew drop honey lemon sweet truths baby whispers cats pointed whiskered tuned into the terrestrial temptation juices flowing down the legs of a nation beautiful storming creation - blackberry hairs and pores of cream skin mirrors showing like rivers - no slices slivers - cries of delight demonize daze constant haze heartache milkshake- sundae shoes mundane maze of syrup chocolate spread chilling over vanilla brimming veins of pulsation vines of persuasion love that drinks deep tastes of summer sleep sunburn how it yearns years yellow suckle skin as it buckles beaches breaking waves winding waist tantalizing truth ocean o's sandy saliva salt slicking lava - licking thin cherry pops melt melodies into the mind dine on pineapple pear precious juices join - lion behold liar beware love becomes and all else numbs.

Tags: Passion, life, creation, animal, time, technology, government, clone, rebirth, love, hate

Relativity - wrote this a few years ago now....

http://wabisabisatva.gaia.com — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 06:39:46 GMT

I am going to post some older writings as I begin to ponder new questions and write some new stream of consciousness rants - funny to look back on what I was thinking before and what has changed.... one of my favorite teachers once pointed out as I continued working on a painting and he looked over my shoulder - that I was, indeed, not the same person as I was yesterday- when I began. This amorphous quality of self and what we call "ego" is both a challenge and a daily opportunity and gift..... you can be as attached as you want and you will still not be the person that you were yesterday.

4/19/03

Sometimes nothing is right - everything seems but nothing actually is. concentric circles wind around your brain - beats break against your eardrum sending pulsing vibrations spiraling into your cerebral cortex- the pupil of your eye reverberates

with each strike of the light. what is the vibrational energy behind what you see- isn't vision just music for your eyes? I feel that I can communicate in ways that most human beings don't believe- this is because I believe that there is only a superficial separation between me and "the other" people or animals on the earth- or even between me and the earth. we are molded of the same clay- we have been rounded by the same hands - feet glued to the same lands- time bending through the same clocks- and no one stops this charade - the cosmic trade the appearance of order instead of the absurdity of chaos. the reality we've made instead of the truth - what?

had an interesting day- went to the museum of Natural History walked through the man made central park - into the building where there was no longer a metal detector system- as if that and Travis had just been a figment of our imaginations- maybe a mutual dream- maybe that is reality a dream that all have agreed to participate in and at any moment we may all wake up - but what if some of us have an inkling of this reality - or unreality - and have no proof - what do we do with this information- does information only have meaning when the concepts are agreed upon by a mutual community. learned about Einstein - relativity - the speed of light- stomp and the common language of music- what is the science of music - is this again what of our man made dichotomies that do not truly exist- what if we applied the theory of relativity to evolution- this would mean that all evolution can only be measured in terms of what has preceded- without any knowledge of the future- what if we applied the theory of relativity to animals and human beings- human beings seem to be moving a varying speeds- in everyday life and mutually at the same speed in the process of evolution? but what if we are moving on a pool table just being jabbed all over the cosmic billiard table- what if we have no control over the cue stick- what if there really is no such thing as motion but instead there is only an impression of motion- if the earth is moving at the speed of the universe and we are moving with the earth- are we really moving at all? what is the difference between standing still and moving imperceptibly? How do we differentiate between sensory input and reality- is there a difference? what in life is not relative- ev it al er- where do we come up with words- we use the same word to talk about a scientific concept and our familial relations. maybe this tells us something- everything is part of the same family - everything is relative. the concept of relativity means that everything is interconnected - nothing can happen without effecting everything else within that system. sy "stem" - it grows - it all has roots - your brain stems - the plants stem - digging deep into the depths of the soil- s- oil - our favorite resource- re - source - to find the source again - the source of what the source of life- the source to continue evolution - or to conserve matter - to re source - to make use of the source again and again and again ad infinitum - never ending - constantly changing - c- hanging - is changing a way of hanging ourselves - only the appearance of motion but really death.

Tags: attachment, stream of consciousness, change, transition, energy, communicate, Museum of natural history, dream, language, einstein, relativity